Everyday, we are aimlessly pursuing what we think we want. Is that what we really want? I have come to learn that my hope and expectations of the world or people is/are futile. Having so much hope only makes me happy for the moment, but when the truth dawns on me, all hopes are dashed. I have learned to be emotionally detached from the people around me, colleagues, families, friends, so as to prevent myself from being hurt by their actions. I believe if they treat me nicer, it is a  bonus. If they treat me bad, I kinda expect it you know, so why would I be disappointed? I know that kind of sounds like a sadist thinking, self-destruction. But I kind of pin my hopes in myself rather than anyone else now. I will tell God all my troubles if there is no one to tell. I will share my thoughts in the blog if there is no one to share with. Hopefully someone out there listens. I will love my pets if there is no one to love. If someone loves me, I will be happy because it is a bonus to me. Having that kind of thinking really comforts me.

I think I need to add some pictures to my blog .. hmm but I am so lazy.. I guess life becomes more hectic at work and therefore, no motivation to do anything after work. Still indulging in Maplestory again.. erm.. but I have a dream.. to do my own BIZ.. very career minded I know.. even as friends around me are married and all, I have no wish to be tied down unless I have lots of money in my account. I am not targeting rich men, do not get me wrong. I am just hoping that I can afford to really provide for a family since standard of living in Singapore is exorbitant. It gets into my nerves knowing that cars and houses are necessary and yet so dam EX! I am not going to pay by instalments... hope I earn enough and one-time down payment. I HATE INTERESTS... you know how scary it gets after choking tons of credit debts before. Starting from a fresh clean slate, the best is to own only one credit card and use only one. Easy repayment PLUS.. it does not spin out of control. MY advice, do not try get a few credit cards because, in the end, you end up paying the minimum sum for all.. IMAGINE.. 5 credit cards' minimum sum is only $250.. how about if you have these debts for months? the minimum sum can double!! and how are you ever going to pay off all your debts if  by repaying one at a time and yet have to pay minimum sums for all!!! SO .. I did pay them off and now I LEARNT a good lesson hehe.. DON't be too greedy la.. ONE card for all ! LIMIT ur spending especially now times are bad.. even interests will go up!

I AM NOT going to benefit the banks again.

ALot of LIFE is about going through it, be it success or failure. DO not be dismayed by failures because without failures, you will never be successful. (MY QUOTE) hehhe .. Same in relationships, failed ones only make you see clearly what you want in life and relationships. SO.. It takes a few failed relationships to finally find true love. AND I do not believe in relationships that have no quarrels. We all have differences, arguments are part and parcels of life. JUST have to go through it and see if you can still bear the thought of living with your partner.

MOST important attribute in a partner I THINK: LOYALTY!!

NO point being with a guy who changes women like changing clothes. =)

SO simple but yet hard to fulfil. IN this age.. who can you trust? TIME will prove it all! BE Patient!!!

BUT I have this weird theory now.. FOR me .. it is better to find a guy much older than me, so that he wont have a change of hearts for younger gals lol..ENough RAMblin for now..

ok i have not blogged like say months.. It is the start of a new year and my resolution is to blog more often. haha.. like I am going to appear in MARCH issue of CLEO.. erm.. I was even contemplating not to blog here but write notes in facebook instead haha.. HUIMIN dear.. I am blogging for you haha.. check out my facebook ba.. add me at the yahoo add haha.. Anyway.. I have alot of things to share.. I AM NOW DEBT FREE!! thankfully except for my car.. still got 20mths to go before finish instalments hehe.. AND.. there is this dream job thing from AUstralian Tourism Board which tempted me to take part.. CAREtaker FOr the Great BArriEr REEF.. for 6mths and U earn $150k AUSSIE dollars.. sounds too good to be true.. I really am so excited to submit application but I worry my dad is going to kill me and I going to lose my current job.. BUt think about it.. I can settle my car instalment in one go and yet enjoy MOther NAture in the best possible way. I have always dreamed of such a job.. GEt CLose to the SUN the Sand and the SEA.. and yet get paid for it ! What an ideal life.. even for 6 mths. I really wishing I GET it.. so I can take lotsa pics.. my fav pastime and go for swim everyday! LEARN snorkelling and scuba diving!!! MY DREAMS coming true all at once.. and I don have to worry about expenditure.. get to travel!! I LOVE TRAVELLING!! COME ON.. I am the best person for the job>.. ahem but I don't think I stand a chance.. with so many ppl applying for this job! I guess it will only be a miracle I get this opportunity.. and gosh..what would dad say? My ah gong gonna faint maybe.. haha..

Ok i gona upload some pics that I took after the CLEO makeover.. this year is the best year for me... REALLY.. thinking all debts settled as the best thing on earth and alot of holidays fall close to weekend so we get a longer break! serious..and I gona take part in many lucky draws.. cos I do feel lucky !

NIght time driving..

Me took this at the RED light..

Me daydreaming in the car!